When I Look In The Mirror

facelift
Nick Anderson

Sometimes I look in the mirror and search deep into my eyes where I see the child I used to be, but the face and body has changed and there’s no turning back- or is there?

I’m sure there are many people who would consider a bit of plastic surgery as they get older. One glimpse of yourself in strong sunlight on a bad day, might be enough to send you to the nearest butcher, I mean surgeon.
I can’t help pulling my face up at the ears to see how I would look with a few nips and tucks here and there. Yes the lines disappear and maybe I look a little younger but do I really want to have a fight with nature? What if it went wrong?

Cosmetic surgery is definitely becoming more accessible to us ordinary folk and there are procedures out there that are less invasive than they once were, but I have to ask myself who would I be doing it for? Maybe it would give me a confidence boost to feel that I looked a little younger, or perhaps I could make myself more attractive to the man in my life, stop him from looking for a younger model! But if those were the reasons, how awful would it be if it just didn’t look right?

Ageing is very cruel in some ways particularly for women. There is much talk about how much pressure there is on us to look good for ever, but maybe it is time to fight back. I look at some of these celebrities who have had work done and I can’t help thinking that they look a bit odd at best. Is it just me or do they all look the same? The character seems to have gone from them, the world is turning us into robots and I’ve had enough. I don’t mean I’m going to let myself go (some will probably say I already have) but I don’t want to lose who I am and become an android.

So I have decided that even if my partner offers to pay, I am not going to have any plastic surgery. Not today anyway.

[Liza]

The Emperor’s New Clothes

donatella
Pip Art

You can usually spot them a mile off – celebrities who’ve gone under the knife in a desperate bid to remain youthful! Even Botox and lip augmentation are easy enough to recognise once you know to look out for the tell tale expressionless face or swollen, pouty lips.

I can only assume that celebrities who have turned themselves into grotesque caricatures as the result of excessive plastic surgery are surrounded by “yes men” who – like the courtesans in The Emperor’s New Clothes – gush and fawn rather than speaking the plain truth.

I can think of no other reason why these celebrities actually think they look good – I mean don’t they possess a mirror? Don’t they realise that they look like they’ve been reassembled using rejected parts from the slaughterhouse floor.

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© Tex Avery

I recently had a photographic portrait done as I needed an up-to-date photo for an application. Some people are very photogenic, I’m not one of them and when I challenged a friend to find just one good photo of me, she couldn’t. The last time I had a portrait shot done was ten years ago and being presented with a hundred images of my face was a traumatic experience – I look like my brother in drag!

Put it this way, if Droopy The Dog needs a stand-in, I’m available.

These days my eyelids are sagging, my jawline is looking a little slack and as for my turkey neck, well what can I say? Although I know it goes with the territory and generally I’m happy being nearly sixty, part of me fantasises about having surgery not to make myself look 40 you understand, just to rectify the flaws. But I am far too squeamish and too much of a coward to ever seriously consider plastic surgery so I guess I’ll just have to carry on avoiding mirrors and hiding behind my camera…

[Pip]