Who The Hell Am I?

I feel compelled to write about the fact that I think I am facing a massive female midlife crisis, life transition, maturity journey or whatever you want to call it!  Well that’s what I think it is anyway, although I mentioned this to a work colleague who just laughed and said you’re way past that age love!  Bloody cheek I thought, but it got me thinking.

Is there an official age to have a midlife crisis then? It never crossed my mind that there was.  Is it at 40? 45? 50? 55?  It depends how long you’re going to live surely? Now there’s a question and imagine if you knew this when you were born.  Would it encourage you to live the life you wanted to live rather than the one you think you have to?  It would be like having a deadline (excuse the pun) and I for one know how mine would go.  It would all happen at the last minute!

Anyway back to my crisis. The thing is I have reached an age where for me as a woman, I am entering a phase of many changes.  My motherly duties are less challenging. I have three children all of whom are independent, wonderful people. Yes they still need me at times for emotional or financial support, but I actually feel that I am no longer a mother first and a person second! It is time for me to be me.

So I’ve been doing a bit of soul searching to say the least, asking myself a few questions, for example: What the hell am I going to do with my life? Do I enjoy my job? What do I really want to do?  What happened to “arty me”?  Do I even like my partner? And who the hell am I anyway’? I think I might be having an identity crisis too.

My plan is to rediscover myself within the blogging universe.



2 thoughts on “Who The Hell Am I?

  1. Eileen I think that we have to stop ‘waiting’ for the next phase of our lives and instead try to rediscover ourselves, be brave and try new things, get on with living the life you want to have!


  2. You are saying my words. I am loved,secure,mothered four children,including one with SEN- yet I feel insignificant. Why? Am I depressed,menopausal,or an empty nester? I feel like I’m just waiting to be a grandmother.

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